July 2024: A month of change and new beginnings

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As June ended with a big plot twist, July was unsurprisingly a huge month for change (and having fun. Probably too much fun, my liver is telling me). The weather went from really really shit to boiling hot, my ex moved out, and various other things happened.

BUT WHAT WERE THEY? You ask… Well, let me tell you.

(You can read January’s here, February’s here, March’s here, April’s here, May’s here and June’s here)

I ventured back to Legoland

It was my son’s ninth birthday (PIMTY TARE!) and the jammy little git had an inset day, so we went to Legoland.

If you love queueing, you will just LOVE Legoland, World of Queues!

I reviewed Legoland six years ago on the blog – a bit unfavourably I must admit – and have not been back since. However it’s just down the road and there isn’t a great deal of 9-year-old birthday fun to be had in Berkshire tbh, so for our sins, we braved it again.

Verdict: It’s still shabby, and FUCKING HELL the queues – even on a Monday during term time – are too much even for the most British of us. No one got time for that; honestly, just pay another disinterested teenager minimum wage to make the queues faster, I beg of you.

And dust stuff occasionally for the love of god. And make your water rides less murky and green.

It’s like they never played Theme Park as a kid.

Anyway we still had a lovely day, despite their best efforts. And no wasps! Although paying to park fucked me right off.

We all said ‘Bye bye Tories, you massive wallopers’

It would be entirely remiss of me not to mention a huge change that happened in early July; the Tories got booted out of government and it was delicious. Locally here in Reading we went Labour from Tory, and in my home town of Worthing they ditched the blue for the first time in 109 years. Nice.

Rather than stay up and doomscroll all night, I took some sleeping supplements and had an early night, and was ABSOLUTELY DELIGHTED to wake up to the likes of Jacob Rees-Mogg, Liz Truss, Gullis and Fabricant losing their seats. Less excited to see Nigel Farage finally gain a seat, the frog-faced c!nt – but given he never turned up when he was an MEP I can’t imagine Reform doing much but sinking into obscurity, if one of them isn’t arrested first.

To be honest it’s all been startlingly dull since Starmer took over – I have no hilarious commentary on any of it. And long may it last. It feels like maybe, just MAYBE, the adults are back in charge. It isn’t and never will be perfect, but fucking hell it has to be better than the last lot.

I drank wine

I was invited along to Casillero Del Diablo’s launch of their new ‘BeLight’ lower alcohol wine.

Pedro Pascal wasn’t there (damnit) but someone off Strictly was, and she was very lovely even though I don’t watch it and had no idea who she was. There was a screening of ‘The Devil Wears Prada’ so we all got dressed up in our best Miranda Priestly get up. Lots of fun.

I went to World’s Strongest Man

My friend had a spare ticket and invited me along at the last minute to see very big men lifting stuff in the Royal Albert Hall. Absolutely superb stuff. Nothing else to say on that really, but it was worthy of a mention.

I prepared to enter the world of the employed

In what felt like the stars aligning, I was offered a job – like, a REAL job, and I’m starting next week. I can’t (and don’t want to – ha!) say too much about it but I’m both nervous – after ten years of working for myself, reporting into a boss is going to be a hell of a change (I definitely can’t just tell people who annoy me to knob off) – and very excited.

It does mean that I’ll spend less time on social media, but that’s a good thing.

DON’T PANIC: I’m not ditching the blog, and I’m certainly not quitting altogether. Please wish me luck!

I bought lots of new clothes

Obviously a new job means I might have to look smart occasionally, so I did a fair bit on online shopping for the first time in forever and this was my takeaway:

I went out too much

It is traditional that, after a breakup, friends will reach out and offer to console you down the pub.

As I have the kids here 50% of the time and as mentioned, a new job starting next week, I had a bit of a ‘last hurrah’ and went out four nights in a row last week and was exceptionally badly behaved.

It was awesome. No ragerts.

And that’s a wrap, really.

If you enjoyed this and you’re feeling generous, you can buy me a cup of tea or a glass of wine here.

You can also see my Amazon wish list here.