Lockdown 2 The Sequel: This time, it’s depressing

I never thought I’d say this again but this is part of the Corona Lockdown Diaries. You can read the rest here.

So, after one term of school and a two week half-term holiday, the second UK Coronavirus lockdown, Lockdown the Sequel, has officially begun.

The non-essential shops are all shut, the pubs and restaurants are closed, cocktails are take-out only and we’re staying at home if we can (except for the kids who are still attending ‘Cough Directly in Each Other’s Face’ club every day).

We did get a little bit of notice of the lockdown this time around.

After not doing a lockdown during half term like almost every expert said we should, the announcement was due to take place on Saturday afternoon. It in fact ended up happening at some point later that evening when Boris could be arsed to turn up. Presumably this was because the people responsible for producing the death-by-powerpoint show we were treated to were busy looking everywhere for the ‘next slide’ clicker, before running out of time and giving up. Seriously guys, they cost approximately one billionth of the cost of a shit track and trace system, treat yourselves.

Anyway, we were given the news on Saturday (which happened to be Halloween, certainly the scariest one I’ve experienced) that the lockdown would take place from Thursday – aka today.

This generously allowed everyone in tier 1 areas to make plans and go out with a bang. One last hurrah, see their friends and family, help the pubs and restaurants and say goodbye to everything fun before a dreary, cold month indoors.

This was nice from a social perspective; a little daft from a COVID spreading perspective.

Luckily for me (I’m SO lucky!) I’ve just had the Rona so odds are I’d be unlikely to catch it again at the moment, and I went out to see friends and have fun, and ate and drank like a condemned woman whose fun plans for the entire month – a comedy night, a child’s seventh birthday, a weekend away with friends – had just been annihilated by the Government.

On the bright side, this time I’m aware of all the major lockdown traditions. Today I’ve neither washed my hair nor worn make up and tomorrow, I may even go braless and drink cocktails in a park. Get them ticked off early.

As well as lockdown, this week was fun for another reason.

I am of course talking about the US election.

Waking up yesterday morning – and I’m talking 3am, not a sensible time. So glad I checked – to the news that America had sat a collective IQ test and alarmingly around half of them had failed gave me eerie, stomach-sinking flashbacks to basically every election from the last eight years.

The news is looking a little less bleak today, but dear LORD it should have been a landslide, surely. Right? That’s what we all thought, over here, watching that lunatic’s alarming Twitter output.

I am well aware that, out of everyone on the planet, Joe Biden might not be the person you’d ideally want to run a country but given the choice of pretty much anyone else at all versus that sociopathic, dayglo, nonsense-Tweeting, tax avoiding, racist, homophobic sexist idiot of toddler-man surely, surely, (like the man himself) it’s a no brainer.

At least Trump is taking potential defeat in good grace…

Hopefully by the time I’ve done the school run, found some pictures, read this through for glaring mistakes and pressed publish, the count will be over and I can breath a sigh of relief and stop doomscrolling through my phone for five minutes.

Maybe I’ll get something, anything useful done.

Feels unlikely.