Elf on the shelf ideas: A day-by-day Elf schedule for the lazy parent

Parenting and life

Did you buy one of those Christmas Elves in a moment of festive madness which you now deeply regret? Panicking because everyone seems to have amazing Elf on the Shelf ideas and you seriously can’t be arsed?

Are you totally stuck for Elf on the Shelf ideas?

Well don’t worry, for I am here to provide help and guidance! Here is a typical day-by-day Elf on the Shelf routine for the festive month of December.

December 1st

Who’s that at the door? A cheeky elf has arrived with his luggage; two chocolate advent calendars wrapped in a bow. What a lovely elf! Where has he come from? He has a letter…. He’s been sent by Father Christmas of course! He’s here to keep an eye on you, to make sure you behave yourself!

Let’s give him a suitable festive name. Elfy. Let’s choose Elfy. That’s original.

December 2nd

Elfy has stuck googly eyes on all the fruit. What a scamp.

December 3rd

He’s swinging from the tinsel! What a brave little Elf.

December 4th

Today he’s got the crayons out and has done a drawing of the family. How lovely.

elf on the shelf ideas
Image credit: The Money Whisperer

December 5th

Elfy is in the bathroom and the impish soul has made a mess by spraying shaving cream everywhere, and covering everywhere in toilet paper! What a to-do. The kids think it’s hilarious. You’re going to have to clean that up you know… Perhaps reign it in a little from now on.

December 6th

Today he’s been making pancakes for breakfast! There is flour everywhere, what a sight – and he’s been making snow angels. Did you not listen to yesterday’s advice? You’re going to be late for the school run.

Elf on the shelf ideas snowangel
Image credit: Arepops

December 7th

Where is Elfy? He’s scaled the Christmas tree! Nice and simple today. Well done.

December 8th

BOO! He’s crept into the kids’ room and has been watching them sleep. In retrospect that’s a bit creepy. Sorry kids.

December 9th

Today he’s in the doll’s house in a compromising position with Barbie! Guessing that mum and dad had a drink last night. Unoriginal, guys.

December 10th

He’s on a shelf. Looks like someone may be running out of ideas.

December 11th

He’s moved to the other end of the shelf. Come on, pick it up a bit. Look at Pinterest for goodness sake. Do you even deserve to be a parent?

elf on the shelf ideas1
Image credit: The Incidental Parent

December 12th

Where is Elfy? He’s using the potty, and there’s a little chocolate Elfy poo in there. Nice?!

Almost half way, you can do this!

December 13th

He’s set up the whole train track and is playing with the trains. Come on kids, pay attention, that took bloody ages and I don’t do this for the good of my health. Appreciate it, you ingrates.

December 14th

He ate all the chocolate off the tree! Shhh, no one needs to know it was daddy’s Christmas do last night and he might have come in late and done it himself… That is the magic of the elf.

December 15th

Elfy has written a letter to Father Christmas to tell him whether you’ve been naughty or nice. Judging by mum sobbing in the corner at the idea of three weeks preschool-free, it’s probably only going to go one way.

Elf on the shelf ideas for all of December

December 16th

He’s… ah. He hasn’t moved. Mum and dad had a bottle of wine last night and forgot. Sorry kids.

December 17th

He’s swinging from the lampshade! The kids meanwhile are totally ignoring him. Why are we bothering with this?

December 18th

He’s, uh… Not given a second thought, too busy doing Christmas stuff. Sorry Elfy.

December 20th

The dog found him. There’s quite a harrowing scene. RIP Elfy.

The kids don’t seem to care, they prefer the chocolate advent calendars anyway. Mum and dad are visibly relieved.

So there you go! I’m now totally out of Elf on the Shelf ideas, and I don’t really care.

Merry Christmas everyone!

If you enjoyed this and you’re feeling generous, you can buy me a cup of tea or a glass of wine here.

You can also see my Amazon wish list here.

What are your thoughts?

If you liked these Elf on the Shelf ideas, why not pin for later?

ELF ON THE SHELF IDEAS! (kind of) Do you have an Elf on the Shelf? If you're looking for Elf on the Shelf ideas, then here is a typical December routine for your Christmas Elf! #elfontheshelf #elfonashelf #elf #christmas #parenting #momlife #mumlife #parentingadvice #elfideas #elfontheshelfideas

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