The Tiffany ‘everyday’ objects are here and WOW they’re on my Christmas list

Dafuq is dis? Parenting and life

With Christmas just around the corner you might be wondering what you could possibly ask for this year.

I was like you, once, but fortunately this brilliant new collection from Tiffany & Co came along and I’ll tell you what, there are just so many things I never knew I needed until I saw the Tiffany Everyday Objects range.

Maybe you’re looking for a festive gift for a really hard-to-please relative?

I know I’ve been struggling, but one visit to Tiffany’s website and BAM, just like that, all my problems were solved.

Don’t worry though, if Tiffany & Co is out of your price range I’ve also included high street alternatives cos I’m nice like that.

1. Luxury: Sterling silver Tin Can, £945

Tiffany everyday objects are here and WOW they're on my Christmas listPutting the everyday into Tiffany Everyday Objects is my personal favourite of the range. Highly recognisable as a Tiffany & Co tin can as opposed to any other kind by the Tiffany blue enamel stripe down the side.

Perfect for… storing stuff in maybe? Perhaps the tears of poor people.

Just make sure the kids don’t try to recycle it.

Meanwhile on the high Street: 4 pack of Heinz Tomato Soup, £2

Eat your soup, rinse out the cans and ta da! High street dupe for a high end can.

Bonuses include: contains actual food and there’s 4 of them. Oh, and they’re £943 cheaper.

2. Luxury: Vermeil Crazy Straw, £330

Who doesn’t need a totally impractical and expensive straw around kids? Tiffany themselves describe this one as a ‘fun and whimsical design that adds a fun and festive addition to the home’. Righty ho then.

Meanwhile on the high Street: Pack of 60 Crazy Straws, £9.99

Now I’ll admit, I’ve gone for one of the more expensive high street options but I feel this pack offers you real value money. 60 crazy straws AND one of the designs even looks a bit like a willy. What’s not to love?

3. Luxury: Ball of Yarn, £8475

No, I haven’t stuck a rogue figure in there somewhere. Nor am I taking the piss. I assume that Tiffany’s might be. I don’t even have any amusing words for this one.

Meanwhile on the high street: Ball of string, £1.23 and Silver spray paint, £3.69.

I mean, it’s a ball of string.  Literally nothing else to say about it.I suppose if you are going for the authentic silver look, you might want some of this too:

Comes in at less than a fiver, leaving you £8470 to buy a car, go on several luxury holidays or perhaps put down a deposit on a small flat.

4. Luxury: Corkscrew £210

The bargain of our list, at just over £200. I mean, let’s gloss over the fact that you can barely buy wine with a cork nowadays and focus on the simple elegance of the piece.

Meanwhile, on the high street: Corkscrew, £7.15 

In keeping with the subtle and beautiful lines of the original, the McLovin corkscrew will impress even the most hoity toity Christmas guest.

5. Luxury: Desk Puzzle £470

If you’re always bored at work, in between yelling BUY BUY BUY, SELL SELL SELL and firing underlings for f*cking up your latte, then this desk game is a great way to pass the time and de-stress.

Meanwhile on the high street: Anti-stress magnetic balls, £8.13

There isn’t an amusing reason to buy this, you just really should. They’re insanely addictive and you can buy nearly 60 of them for the price of one stupid Tiffany thingamyjig.

6. Luxury: Pencil Sharpener, £260
Tiffany everyday objects are here and WOW they're on my Christmas list

Contains three pencils because otherwise that would just be a rip off, wouldn’t it?

Meanwhile on the high street: Cat’s bum pencil sharpener, £7.95

If what you’re really looking for is a talking point, then I’d wager that this one would probably invite more conversation when displayed proudly on your office desk.

7. Luxury: First Aid Box, £565

Tiffany everyday objects are here and WOW they're on my Christmas listI don’t know about you, but when I’ve cut the tip of my finger off, what is important to me is that the first aid box has class. Doesn’t contain any actual plasters.

Meanwhile on the high street: First aid kit, £13.54

To my mind, is better than the Tiffany & Co alternative due to the fact it contains things that might be of use in the event of a cut or burn. I don’t know. Just seems more ‘first aidy’ to me.

8. Luxury: Paper Cup, £540Tiffany everyday objects are here and WOW they're on my Christmas list

Made of sterling silver, but be warned, you can’t actually put hot liquid inside it.

Meanwhile on the high street: Paper cups, £6.99

One hundred times as much for one 77th of the price meaning you could have almost 8000 of these for the same money. That’s one a day for 21 years, or if you really like your coffee, three a day for seven years and NO washing up.

9. Luxury: Ruler, £425 and Triangle, £375

Great for people who like to measure things that are no bigger than 6 inches. 

Good for people that like corners.

Meanwhile on the high street: Geometry tools, £3

For us poor unfortunates without £425 to spunk on tat, here is a very useful set of geometry tools which does exactly what the other one does; more in fact because you get TWO triangles AND a protractor so you can even measure angles too. Woah. It’s also safe to use without someone mugging you or thinking you’re a pretentious wanker.

I hope you enjoyed that and found it useful, and maybe my alternatives to the Tiffany Everyday Objects even helped you save some money!

If you’re in the market for Christmas gifts, I have a great selection here (as long as you don’t like the person you’re buying for).

Why not leave a comment, telling us your favourite? You can do it here or on Facebook:

Tiffany Everyday Objects - ridiculously expensive Christmas gifts from Tiffany & co and some hilarious alternatives - funny gag gifts, lol, birthdays, secret santa

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