Tag: rants

Pregnancy sucks, and I am happy to admit it

How are you feeling? Throughout both of my pregnancies, I was asked this almost every day by somebody; on the train, at work, maybe in the queue at Boots while I was waiting for more Gaviscon. Right after ‘do you know what you’re having?’ (‘yes’ or ‘a baby’ being my …

Flying solo: One weekend of parenting alone

One hour and 17 minutes. That is how long I have been sitting in my children’s room, waiting for them to fall the f*ck to sleep. Specifically the small one. It is Saturday night, and it’s almost 8.30pm. By now I’ve basically read the whole of the internet and I …

The many ways in which I screwed up today

SO THIS IS HOW MY DAY WENT: 6:03: Small one awake. He gets out of bed, opens his bedroom door (he is like a sixteen-month-old Indominous Rex – never underestimate him) and starts banging against ours and squealing and whinging.  Time to get up! Or at least for daddy. I …

Happy Halloween…

So not only do we have to suffer the indignity of the clocks going back this weekend, but it’s also Halloween on Monday. Yup. Hold on to your pants. Back in those relaxing and hedonistic days before children I probably enjoyed Halloween as an excuse to dress up in something …

My birthday sleepover and a visit to Peppa Pig World

Last week it was my birthday. I got two pairs of slippers; I think I have officially reached old age. I’m OK with that. They are nice slippers. It also happened to be half term for my sister, who is a teacher in a school with enviably long half term …

Me and my shadow: The clingiest kid in town

I’m aware I’ve done a lot of moaning about my son lately. I would apologise, but that is basically what this blog is for. I don’t make money out of it, it eats up the majority of my very limited spare time, it’s way more complicated than I ever anticipated, …

The nap jerk: The non-sleeping toddler

Around nine months ago, so my blog (which I had just started) reminds me, my son had yet to sleep through the night. He first achieved it around three months later, aged about nine months; I’ve never blogged excessively about this momentous occasion because I didn’t want to jinx it. …

Wet Mondays: Autumn is a bastard

Well goodbye summer… and hello autumn. With late September comes conkers, browning leaves, the smell of bonfires lingering in the air… The nights are drawing in earlier, just perfect for snuggling. Hot chocolate is mandatory and of course, there’s  the ability to hide excess pounds with thick woolly jumpers. That …

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