Friday, 2 December 2016

Blogueurs dans Paris: E-Fluent Spot 5

Blogueurs dan Paris: E-Fluent Spot 5
The last time I went to Paris, I was 11 years old. 

My overwhelming memory of it was being sick, lots, and crazy traffic. Somehow, despite visiting a lot of European cities in my late teens and early 20s, I never returned. I very rarely travel these days (for very good reason) and I haven't been on a city break in ten years or more.

When French magazine Parole de Mamans announced that they would be bringing top bloggers from around Europe to their E-Fluent Spot (no jokes, please) blogging conference I really wanted to go. To be honest it could have been two nights in a Travelodge on the M25 and I probably still would have applied as long as it was childfree.

Sunday, 27 November 2016

21st Century Parenting: Ten reasons why it's not easier

21st Century Parenting: Ten reasons why it's not easier

Last week, I briefly mused about the modern wonder that is smartphones.

They're crap for blogging but they have revolutionised parenting. Waiting for the child to fall asleep? Mess around on Twitter. Kids fallen asleep in the car? Get into an argument with a Trump supporter on a Scary Mommy article on Facebook. In a restaurant and food taking f*cking ages? Yay, it's Peppa Pig on YouTube. Life is sweeter with technology on board.

Of course this is by no means the only big difference in child-rearing 'twixt the generations. You can't dispute that parenting has changed enormously, probably since you yourself were born, as it did between our grandparents' and parents' generations, and not only weaning and safety guidelines; always a fun topic. For a start, thanks to amazing leaps in science more of us can now get pregnant, survive childbirth and have children which live past babyhood. That's terrific.

We have disposable nappies, which while not being great for the environment, do make the early days when they poo 15 times a day and never sleep so, so much easier. If reusable nappies are your thing, you're probably glad for modern tumble dryers which mean you don't have to wait for a sunny day to hang everything out. Not many of them around at the moment, and drying stuff in the house is almost IMPOSSIBLE as I have learned this week while I'm waiting for my bastard Hotpoint tumble dryer to be fixed YET AGAIN.

We also have online shopping, and for this I am eternally grateful.

However, I entirely disagree with the notion that parenting is easier these days. And here are ten reasons why.

Tuesday, 22 November 2016

Flying solo: One weekend of parenting alone

Flying solo: One weekend of parenting alone. It's all about survival.
One hour and 17 minutes.

That is how long I have been sitting in my children's room, waiting for them to fall the f*ck to sleep. Specifically the small one.

It is Saturday night, and it's almost 8.30pm. By now I've basically read the whole of the internet and I have 11% battery left on my phone. How the hell people parented before smartphones I just don't understand. I bet it was shit.

I've misjudged it twice so far; got up and, as stealthily as I could, tiptoed out of the room only to be followed minutes later by a small, screaming, angry human. You'd think he'd get the drill by now, but NO. Leave too soon, before he's properly, fast asleep and my god you incur his wrath. I'm here for the long haul.

Sunday, 20 November 2016

Another birthday blog: Kids Parcel review

Another birthday blog: @KidsParcel review
One thing that birthdays lose as you get older is the element of surprise. 

If you actually get any presents at all, they are usually ones you've specifically asked for or at least circled in the Argos catalogue left open on the appropriate page. Or slippers.

For kids though, birthdays are magical and all about surprises. This year was the first year that she has not only been aware of 'special present opening and eating cake and being the centre of attention' day but also anticipated it.

When Kids Parcel approached me about reviewing one of their mystery present boxes, I thought it would be a great idea as the big one's birthday was coming up and it would add a little bit of surprise fun for all of us. I definitely didn't say yes because it would take away the hassle of actually picking presents. No siree.

Friday, 18 November 2016

Things that have annoyed me this week

Things that have annoyed me this week and some things that have been awesome
Another week has passed.

And a memorable week it has been.

I'm pretty tired, having been out a few times which is most irregular, and I have yet to catch up on the minimal sleep I'm used to. Instead of looking forward to a lie in this weekend, I've just been reminded that I'm parenting solo (as of now until Sunday) during which I have managed to commit myself to two third birthday parties on the same day. With two children. On my own.

We've run out of milk and bananas and I've already had a full scale argument about teeth brushing as well as one not-in-the-potty poo. It isn't 9am yet. Standard.

Anyway, here are some things that have peed me off this week...

Tuesday, 15 November 2016

Happy third birthday! With a Toddler Tools

The big one's third birthday balloon
As you'll probably know, my laptop is still broken. Well, it might be fixed, but whatever state it is in, I do not have it. 

Rather annoyingly, I'd written the best part of a 'happy birthday' post and then saved it - not in Blogger (yes, gasp, I'm still on Blogger. I'm way too lazy to contemplate moving) but in Word. Why, I have ABSOLUTELY no idea but it does mean that rather than a well thought out, reflective and heartfelt piece with a few nice pictures thrown in, it's going to be a ramble about the day (well, three days really. Have to fit the grandparents in!).

Anyway, enough excuses.

Monday was the big one's third birthday. We didn't throw a birthday party for many reasons; firstly, we really don't have the space here, and paying to outsource it although an excellent idea is an added cost we just can't swallow at the moment. Besides, she has just started pre-school and I don't know what her friends are even called, let alone know their parents.

Sunday, 13 November 2016

Blogfest 2016 - Oh, and some awards too

So, ladies and gents, if you didn't know already, this is now an award winning blog.

Yep, against every expectation I won the Best Comic Writer award at the Mumsnet Blogging Awards. I must say that did make up for Friday's disaster day somewhat.

I wasn't sure whether to start from the beginning and do a rundown of my day at Blogfest, but to be honest loads of people will be doing that, my memory isn't great, and the biggest thing for me about blogging conferences is meeting/catching up with other bloggers and chatting about things like DA, PRs, Moz, Tots, SEO and other stuff that people outside of the blogging world are probably blissfully unaware of and definitely don't give a shit about.

I will instead pick out the highs and lows of my day:

Awesome people.
Ridiculously photogenic Hattie, That Mum Blog